Month: January 2020

Cherished Childhood Memories

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

Childhood memories are always special.

The other day, I was on my way to office in a cab and to pass time, decided to watch a couple of videos on YouTube. Don’t know what triggered the video in my feed, but I was watching a satirical take on Super Mario, the video game superhero.

As I watched it, I was smiling from one end to the other. Amused, I forwarded to some of my friends and groups and downloaded it as well. And then I remembered it again today morning and rewatched it along with my daughter.

Well, playing video games used to be a lot of fun and a time to cherish for us kids. However, it wasn’t allowed usually and only during summer vacations did we get a free run.

In fact, summers used to be the time when you could do anything – sleep till late, read tons of comics, play board/card/video games, have ice cream and soda, and on and on. So naturally, all of us cousins used to look forward to gang up during these vacations.

As I grew up, a few video game parlours mushroomed and we friends used to visit those game zones, parting with our precious savings for an hour of play, competing with each other, learning precious life lessons and enjoying together.

As time passed by, all of us grew up and went on our own paths. We catch up every now and then, when work travel takes us to each other’s place or when a wedding or function in the family comes along. And each time we meet, we end up cherishing all those memories of time spent together.

The video brought back a flood of all those memories and reminded me of not only playing the video game but also of the time spent with all my cousins and friends. What a wonderful childhood it was!!!

Women – the better halves!

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

Parenting has its gift of insights.

Yesterday, while with the family, a small incident led me to think about how important the role of a woman is in life…

My little one dotes on my wife – she is her mother, friend, guide, everything rolled into one. I am important, but just so. And so, every time there’s something that goes wrong, she tends to cling to my wife and I only play a supporting role at best.

My wife on her part, tries to do her best using all her abilities. But sometimes when the best isn’t enough, and I feel she is on the verge of exasperation and giving up, I get surprised as she comes up with one more trick up her sleeve and to my pleasant surprise, normalcy returns.

I cannot even imagine some of those tricks at times. And no, it’s not that I don’t try – I sometimes try too hard and fail. It’s a lot of times failing to empathise/sympathise with the little one. But it doesn’t come naturally to us dads.

So the minor incident yesterday led me to marvel at this trait of hers. And when I thought deeper, I could see that in my mother, sisters and aunts. In fact in some of my colleagues at work also.

Now that’s a spectacular trait – a woman, whatever her situation or circumstance, has the innate ability to sympathise and empathise with the child. And the same trait extends when she is with her husband, her father, her brother. Or in her career.

She might be busy like hell or totally focused on something else but you can count on her to immediately refocus, empathise and get to the root of the situation within a whisker, something we men can only wish for.

Not to say that men don’t empathise or sympathise – I am just making a comparison here in terms of whether it’s an innate ability or not. And hands down, women are better.

Honestly, that’s better off for us men too – otherwise who would understand us, allow us to be ourselves, handle all our idiosyncrasies and behaviour, and still take care of us. We would be lost without our moms, sisters, wife.

Same goes for the workplace – women are better co-workers, leaders, and influencers. And when we work with them and appreciate and respect what they bring to the table, we are better off and win together.

It’s time we understand and appreciate the women in our lives. And the others whom we work with. Specially now, when women are taking upon bigger responsibilities and managing not only the household but also their careers.

I am certainly learning to. Perhaps not so much when I was growing up or even after getting married. But definitely after becoming a father.

Kudos to the fairer and stronger gender!!!

Well Informed or Well Read???

~ Rishi

The newspaper guy knocked on the door. Bill time, I said. My wife made a mild protest – why buy a newspaper when you can read things online or use phone apps. Valid argument. But then, there are pros and cons to everything.

As I paid the newspaper bill, I muttered why it feels better to read a newspaper. But there’s been something else that’s been behind my urge to continue with a newspaper in this digital era.

And no, it’s not the idea that I need to hold a paper and read it as part of my morning routine – I ain’t the paper types – have switched to Kindle instead of stocking books long back.

There was a time in between when I had moved to online/apps to get my daily dose of news and views. Twitter was exciting and fun with instant views and counter-views. And of course, there were the numerous apps from all news channels and publications that I read on a daily basis.

But as I spent time on those news apps and on social media to get my fix in the intervening years, it slowly dawned upon me that I was also wasting a lot of time being led astray or just being consumed in the news world. Using these apps a couple of hours a day was fanning an addiction within me to stay connected and up to date on what’s happening across everything in the world, just because it felt good. And it was taking me away from reading meaningful stuff and instead cluttering my mind with things that weren’t really required to be there.

So, after those years in digital news Lala-land, last year I decided to reduce my screen time on these apps. I deleted all but one of those news apps from my phone. I looked at all the sites that I visited often and chose a handful that offered me real, meaningful stuff and subscribed to their newsletters. And I absolutely cut down on reading news on social media.

Now I login to the news app for reading about once or twice a week. I still login to social media everyday but to wish birthdays, look at what my connections are up to, and to connect in a real sense. But my dose of news now comes from the newspaper – concise and once a day. It keeps my perspective fresh without urging me to know everything that’s happening instantly.

The benefit – I have started reading much more of the meaningful stuff. From the newsletters/digests I get. From platforms like Wired and Inc42 and Medium. I have gone back to reading books on diverse subjects and broadening my horizons.

This has perhaps made me aloof from the social media and the incessant views and opinions on almost everything. But it has definitely brought back some semblance into my life.

Well, the reason for this rant is two-fold – I was today running through Twitter and felt the urge to hop into those views and counter-views but remembering my decision, stopped short and was forced to think on the subject. On a different note, I met someone yesterday who reads 100 books a year and as I was reflecting on the conversation with him, it occurred to me that how the number of people who are reading have increased but it’s got more to do with the urge to be informed than being knowledgeable.

And I had to write about how I escaped that spiral. About how the switchover has been a real life changer for me by decluttering my mind space. And in today’s fast world of numerous commitments and stress, that’s definitely been a relief.

As I close this piece, I hope that we all read and learn better and grow in our chosen paths to become well-read and not just well-informed.

New year resolution

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

A new year begins. Or as some people are enthusiastically calling it, a new decade.

Over the years, all of us have grown accustomed to celebrating the new year eve and vouching for new year resolutions ranging from getting fitter to taking less stress to following our passion. Some people plot their dreams and goals and stick them everywhere to create a positive reinforcement cycle.

It’s another matter that most of us forget about these resolutions and go back to the old rhythm. The dreams and goals are forgotten in the cold gush of the reality wind.

So when my wife asked me “what are your goals for the coming year”, it caught me unawares as I hadn’t thought about the subject at all. Somewhat ashamed, it got me thinking of two things – do I want to set some goals, if yes what’s my plan to make them happen. And if no, why?

You see, we like to conform to the society’s notion that we are constantly improving ourselves in all spheres – personal, professional, financial, spiritual etc. But it may not be as important for me as a person to focus on improvement in one of these aspects than let’s say another person X. So what kind of a goal do I want and do I really want to achieve it? I kept thinking for the last few days.

Then, on a longish flight on Sunday, devoid of other pursuits, I decided to apply my mind to this matter.

Now, in my opinion, if I am not obsessing over a goal, it’s pursuit is not going to last long. And I might as well save that time to focus on better things. Combined with the belief that if I keep at something sincerely, I will do well in it eventually, it dawned on me that I didn’t want to have any improvement goal this year, if at all.

After some thought, I have chosen to do something which is going to expand my horizons, literally. I am just going to follow something that got lost for sometime.

Long forgotten within me has been a writer lurking inside, someone who had taken a backseat in the hustle of life over the last 3 years or so.

So, this new year I am attempting to write again. Beginning with this post. Adding a new one every week and perhaps a few stories that I want to tell. Let’s see. Right now, it’s just an attempt to get back to an ex-flame. Hope to endeavour and make it burn brighter as the year progresses.