Learning from Experience

October 12, 2026 ~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

It is such a cliched phrase. We often quote it, we often read it, we often hear it.

But do we practice it enough? Do we deliberately seek that wisdom?

As is often the case, we do know this subconsciously. We know that there’s much more our elders or just people who’ve had more experience than us can offer us.

Perhaps, as with those truisms that stay with us without being heeded enough, we ignore or overlook this powerful tool.

This past week, I had a couple of instances when I was reminded of this timeless adage.

The first, as is the wont for a dad, was a conversation with my girl about her learning. I was speaking with her about how these days kids don’t spend enough time with elders, and how it robs them of learning through from the wisdom their elders have.

As we discussed my childhood and how I learnt from my elders, I realized that I still have opportunities to do so. Somehow, in the humdrum of acting like a grown-up, I had unknowingly overlooked the fact.

It made me think about the benefits I could reap in different spheres of life by doing so. And the more I thought about it, the more it made sense to me.

The second instance was a conversation with a neighbour about an issue we have been dealing with. He is quite elder to me but is also a friend.

As we were discussing the issue, he shared some insights from his past life which aptly fit the situation. And as I listened to him, I felt I was being immersed in something I had never known.

Just during the chat, talking about his experience, I learnt so much. And I believe, as we work through the situation we have in front of us, I will surely learn much more.

What a wonderful way to learn, I recalled after our chat…

There are so many other contexts, that I don’t know about or haven’t been exposed to yet. Hopefully, I will find enough opportunities to know and interact with experienced people on those topics.

All I have to do is to remain open to learn!

Generation Gap!

September 20, 2026 ~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

Something that we often refer to when we don’t know how to bridge the distance between us and someone younger or older…

This is how I define the term. And have often used it accordingly. Mostly when I am referring to the age difference being a decade or more.

A couple of weeks ago, I however, had a most illuminating conversation with my daughter.

She was relaying to me how different kids respond when asked about their device usage. Sample this response to the following question –

“Do you have a phone or any other personal device like a laptop or an iPad?”

Kid in sixth grade: No, I don’t have a phone; I have a laptop (or an iPad) for school work.

Kid in fourth grade: Obviously, I have a phone; and yes I have an iPad (or a laptop).

My daughter told me this quite animatedly, which made me laugh. She too laughed along, amused that a kid just two years younger had a very different answer.

Amusement aside, what she was pointing to me almost seems like a generational gap!

As I wondered about it later, and relayed it to a friend over dinner this weekend, it occurred to me that the entire concept of the term is due to change.

With the rapid pace we are seeing in some areas of development, such scenarios won’t be too far off.

It led to a question – what happens when people just two or three years apart start feeling a difference in how each of them conduct themselves?

While growing up, as well as later in life, we often rely on our elder siblings, or cousins, or school/college seniors for guidance, learning, and a myriad of other things.

If the gap starts to form so early in life and continues to expand, how are these learning pathways going to cope with them?

How will we feel, how will we share, how will we shape up?

Or are we all going to rely on some AI to keep us feeling that we are in the midst of people who understand us???

‘Freedom to Fail’

June 28, 2026 ~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

These words contain a dichotomy. How can someone be given the room to fail?

And yet, they are magical. For in these words, lie the very essence of why someone succeeds…

A couple of weeks ago, I watched a new TV series on how India’s biggest watch company, Titan, came into existence.

It was a great reminder of the heroic power of entrepreneurship and the persistent belief to make it happen.

The biggest line that remained with me post the watch, was “freedom to fail”!

It was used by the protagonist to egg on his team after an abject failure. And by his mentor, silently, to convey his confidence in his protege.

In the past couple of weeks, as I often thought about it, I realised how important it is in our life too.

Ask a parent about how their child grew up. Most likely because they let her have the freedom to fail. When she was taking her first steps, or when she was rushing to make friends, or when she was trying to learn a new skill. They didn’t judge her or stop her from doing those things.

Ask a teacher about her best students. She allowed them to experiment and learn, rather than stopping them from anything. Even her worst students were allowed the freedom to fail, in the hope that they will rise some time.

Ask a husband about his wife. How they became successful in their marriage because they allowed each other the freedom to be themselves and fail at a few things when it came to each other’s expectations. And in doing so, how they learnt to stand by each other during the toughest times, even though they may have failed on a simple occasion.

Or ask anyone who succeeded in a corporate job, how they reached where they are. I doubt if we will find even one case where they would not have encountered a senior who had allowed them to falter and yet succeed in the longer run.

You see, it is this freedom to fail that gives anyone the confidence to succeed. That is why the child, the student, the spouse, or the teammate get past hurdles in life and learn to live.

And yet, the first thought that comes to mind when we hear these three words is, “oh, that’s strange!”.

It is perhaps our conditioning that needs to change…

The Fear Factor

April 12, 2026April 12, 2026 ~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

I was holding my breath, trying to not look down.

At one end of a zip line between two mountains in the lower Himalayas, I was unsure of a lot of things. Fear was taking root in me.

Just behind me, the instructor was pushing me to let it go and literally, go! To overcome my fear and take inspiration from the views I was about to enjoy.

At nineteen years of age, not many people would be in such a scenario. But I was, and so were my other Army batchmates at the mid term camp.

As I contemplated my options, the only way forward was to go. So, I let my body loose and zipped through. Fear turned into exhilaration and by the time I touched the other end, I knew that I could do this again.

This lesson has remained with me all my life. And a mantra to use when in doubt…

This week, as I was talking to a couple of colleagues and then a friend, this theme recurred. Of deciding to let go and conquering fear to get to the other end.

I think all of us live in some or the other fear. Very few are truly fearless.

And those fears often hold us back. They cloud our judgement, make us overcautious, and reduce our chances.

Often times, it is easier to say than do. But in this case, saying makes it tougher. In our minds.

But what if we were able to always draw inspiration from the view we would uncover through the journey to the other side? What if we just let go and find for ourselves what lies beyond?

Conquering the fear factor.

We will either uncover a view not seen before, or fall flat and rise up again, never to make that same mistake. And that in itself is a win!

Here’s to unshackling ourselves and moving forward…

Outdoors!

March 29, 2026 ~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

Rains bring nostalgia. They also bring fond memories of childhood. At least for me.

Today, as it rained in the evening and I stood in the balcony, enjoying the fresh air. As the petrichor wafted through my senses, I floated back to the past.

Where I come from, rains used to be a welcome relief after the sweltering summer heat. It meant cooler days and the prospect of playing outdoors again.

Not that we children were stopped by the heat to play outdoors. But the play time used to be limited in those months, as most kids were bound inside or traveling during the holidays.

Another factor adding to the fun used to be the timing of our schools, with the initial few weeks of a new session relatively easier to deal with. So, everyone had more time on their hands, and no pressure of tests.

We used to get wet in the rain playing football. Cycles zooming past the by-lanes, riding around was another fun activity. And even though we would get drenched quite often, we enjoyed those days.

So, while winters used to be the prime time for sports and a lot of other activities, rainy season had its own charm. And something to maximise for, in our dictionaries.

Cut to today, I didn’t see any kid playing outside in our community. In fact in my previous ones as well. They were all playing inside, in the games room and were not happy about it. But probably conditioned by their families to not get wet, they were reluctant to venture out.

As I observed them, I realised that we as parents are creating too many boundaries for our kids. We are constantly policing their whereabouts, instructing them to not do anything that we won’t like to do ourselves.

In fact, a lot of kids don’t even come to play outdoors now. Because they have classes at that time. Engaged in extra curricular activities, they rarely experience the joys of being outdoors.

I believe that is a big reason why kids today are more awkward socially than we were. We are restricting them from free flowing natural and serendipitous interactions, and instead creating too many structured paths for them.

Structure is good. In its limits. For, we don’t know how the world will pan out in the next five years, forget in a decade or two.

On the other hand, outdoors teach kids things that they wouldn’t learn in a classroom. Behaviours and attitudes reflect naturally in a field. And playing together creates bonds and memories that last for a lifetime.

By not letting our young ones outdoors, we are putting a lot of pressure on them to succeed in a chaotic future world that will behave randomly and with new rules. Or maybe with none…

“Hard work”

February 15, 2026 ~ Rishi ~ 2 Comments

An important but underrated quality! Something that we don’t appreciate often enough.

A lot of us talk about doing smart work. In today’s age, that is all that matters. Getting more done in lesser time with lesser resources.

But smart work often forces us to consider how to optimise. What if we didn’t know well enough what we are optimising?

I have often wondered about how for our kids, learning the right things is more important than learning to optimise. And how do we make that happen.

So, when our daughter had to go through a 2-month project in Grade 5, I was waiting to see how it pans out. And how the school guides the kids in their approach.

All through the project duration, we were informed and updated on a need to know basis. Naturally, our curiosity was heightened by the time the kids had to present their work.

The one thing I did observe during the first few weeks, and which became evidently clear in the last two weeks of the project, was that the project involved a lot of work.

Well, that was expected. What we didn’t know was how would the kids approach it and how would they come out on the other side.

So, with only a little idea of how things had come out, we went to the school for the exhibition. What I saw was quite fascinating!

The kids had done some really hard work to put things together. Their basic research was quite thorough and their exhibits were impressive.

What was more encouraging was the depth and breadth of the presentations. As we visited the exhibits and talked to them, the kids excitedly demonstrated their work. With a lot of pride.

The school had made them toil in their groups. They had been made to do things properly. And it was showing in how they were talking about it.

There were no optimisations. There were no shortcuts. Just plain, simple, old school approach to doing things deeply.

As the day came to an end, I could observe most of them were happy. With their effort. With themselves and for their group.

They had successfully cleared the test. More importantly, they had learnt the value of hard work.

And hopefully, lessons that will be embedded in their young minds forever…

Being Grateful

April 6, 2025 ~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

Being grateful is often something we talk about. How it’s an important aspect of leading a happy life.

And yet it is so difficult to feel that way constantly!

This weekend, I was speaking to my daughter about how wonderful a life she has and how she should be grateful about it.

While discussing the subject with her, I was telling her to look at the bright side of life always. As I gave her some examples of things she has, which others don’t, I realised the same holds true for me also.

Then, as the conversation progressed, and I was telling her about the numerous problems in the world and how we should be thankful that we are relatively better off, it occurred to me that this was applicable for me too.

Finally, we chatted about the notion of positivity and negativity, and how it is upon us to look at the bright side of things and lead a happy life. While she nodded, I felt like nodding too, to acknowledge this in my heart.

As she agreed with my reasoning and to keep these perspectives in mind, I couldn’t help but remember how I had had a similar conversation when I was young.

And then in a few years I had to be reminded of them again. Not because I had forgotten but because I had chosen to not remember.

It happens again and again. Every few months, I have to keep reminding myself of these truths.

Something so simple but so difficult to follow…

Pain Tolerance

March 16, 2025 ~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

How much pain can we tolerate? Literally. In both our mind and our body.

Having suffered a serious injury that led to leaving the armed forces, and having gone through other health issues, this is not just a figurative question. It is a personal one.

Every time something happens to me, my pain tolerance behaviour kicks in. At times I take things in stride and go on without worrying. But at times, it makes me avoid anything that could cause more discomfort.

It is interesting because my mind behaves randomly on the same topic. Strange too.

This Friday, as I took a flight back home and landed with not just a jet lag but a muscle spasm around my shoulder, my mind started to work. It told me to take things easy. So, I have been. Applying ointments and eating painkillers while avoiding any strenuous activity.

What if I had something urgent to attend to at home? I am sure, my mind would have told me to forget about all the pain and instead focus on the urgent matter. I may have still needed the ointments and painkillers but those would have been taken to continue.

Reflecting on this behaviour, I was wondering why is it so? Is it normal? Is it something only I go through? Or am I being unnecessarily paranoid over something not worth its while?

My reflections led me to my earlier experiences when I had either taken heed of my mind and succumbed to the inactivity or when I had pushed the discomfort aside to focus on other important things.

What I realised is that it is all dependent on the motive. Do I have something on my hands which I am so engaged in that nothing else matters? Am I so charged up that a niggle doesn’t bother me?

If I don’t have a strong reason, my mind tends to take things easy; almost as if it is telling me not to bother because there’s nothing more important than myself. Well, that isn’t completely untrue! But it also cannot be true every time because then I wouldn’t be able to grow.

Perhaps the balance is in allowing the mind to let the body slack a bit when needed. After all, the mind and the body know better than us. Interspersed with elongated periods of acute focus and activity when nothing else matters. Something that has worked for me in the recent past.

Again, not generally applicable, but maybe it is a good practice to check on where we are in life when such a signal comes. What do we do in those moments could very well define how much fuel power we have to persevere and continue running.

Because while life is short, it is long enough to play in the balance…

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