Contradictory, right! After all, who in their best mind could think of not acting in their own interest!

We as humans are here on the planet as a living proof of survival of the fittest; and we are programmed to act in our own interest, which is always paramount. How do we do any thing in a way that we benefit from it, directly or indirectly, is an art we have mastered.

It’s in our genes. If not for ourselves, we wouldn’t be alive. Or even if we are alive, we wouldn’t be prospering. Or even if we are prospering, we wouldn’t be on the top of the game.

And so the vicious cycle goes. Day after day, year after year, lifetime after lifetime…

On the other extreme, there are those moments where that selfishness takes a backseat. Specially when we are dealing with something that is so dear to us, we cannot but keep our interests aside to serve that other interest. For some it is family, for some it is their religious or spiritual belief, for some it is even worldly possessions.

But there are very few instances when we experience something which hangs in the balance. Where we act selflessly, don’t win or don’t gain anything, but still go ahead and do it for it is the right thing to do. These are moments that come and go in a jiffy. And when we look back, we realize we did something truly different.

One such moment happened to me this week.

As it happened, while having an interview conversation, I realized that while the person on the other side had some valuable experiences, he wouldn’t be the right fit in my team. I also figured that he was probably not going on the right track looking for a change as of now.

You see, when you are interviewing someone for a role, you tend to become philosophical! 😀

I don’t know why but I switched over and became selflessly interested to help him out. I told him honestly that I would not be able to consider him for the role he was interviewing for. I also advised him to stick it out in his current role and gain experiences that may help him later on.

He was also receptive to the things I was saying and listened intently and was thankful for that exchange. Or maybe I am overreacting.

Anyhow, we ended on a happy note, both being satisfied with where the conversation led to. I felt happy telling him what exactly was running on my mind. And the fact that he appeared to accept it and seemed relieved to hear those words, told me that he was also in sync.

In that exchange, telling the other person what he should be hearing rather than a polite ‘we will get back to you’, appeared more natural to me in that moment. And while I think of it as selfless, as in not being driven by any desire for self gains, it worked in my interest in the context of the interview by closing the loop on that candidate faster.

Not that I have done this a lot. I could maybe count such instances on fingers, among the countless interviews I have taken over the last few years. It’s not because I consciously choose to avoid being direct, just that somehow it doesn’t happen with the flow a lot of times.

But it made me realize that when these moments do occur, they reveal the importance of being able to connect with someone beyond immediate self interest. Rare than most other precious things in life!