Observations

“Hard work”

~ Rishi ~ 2 Comments

An important but underrated quality! Something that we don’t appreciate often enough.

A lot of us talk about doing smart work. In today’s age, that is all that matters. Getting more done in lesser time with lesser resources.

But smart work often forces us to consider how to optimise. What if we didn’t know well enough what we are optimising?

I have often wondered about how for our kids, learning the right things is more important than learning to optimise. And how do we make that happen.

So, when our daughter had to go through a 2-month project in Grade 5, I was waiting to see how it pans out. And how the school guides the kids in their approach.

All through the project duration, we were informed and updated on a need to know basis. Naturally, our curiosity was heightened by the time the kids had to present their work.

The one thing I did observe during the first few weeks, and which became evidently clear in the last two weeks of the project, was that the project involved a lot of work.

Well, that was expected. What we didn’t know was how would the kids approach it and how would they come out on the other side.

So, with only a little idea of how things had come out, we went to the school for the exhibition. What I saw was quite fascinating!

The kids had done some really hard work to put things together. Their basic research was quite thorough and their exhibits were impressive.

What was more encouraging was the depth and breadth of the presentations. As we visited the exhibits and talked to them, the kids excitedly demonstrated their work. With a lot of pride.

The school had made them toil in their groups. They had been made to do things properly. And it was showing in how they were talking about it.

There were no optimisations. There were no shortcuts. Just plain, simple, old school approach to doing things deeply.

As the day came to an end, I could observe most of them were happy. With their effort. With themselves and for their group.

They had successfully cleared the test. More importantly, they had learnt the value of hard work.

And hopefully, lessons that will be embedded in their young minds forever…

Spot the difference.

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

We always will be different from others. That’s a fact. But we don’t treat it as such. And that often leads to differences!

The past two weeks, I was traveling for work. During that trip, I met a lot of people at a conference, from different nationalities. Apart from the usual work-related discussions, there were also some great conversations about personal stuff as we compared notes on a multitude of things ranging from life to culture to values.

Guess what was the common thing? Everyone was different. In terms of their outlook, their perspective, their values, their beliefs, etc.

Over the weekend, I also observed many a people while roaming around markets and in restaurants. Those observations tallied with my personal interactions.

And yet, as I reflected upon those insights and my behavior, I found that while I inherently understand that others are different than me, I often expect them to behave the way I do. Or understand me instantly.

As I dug deeper through my interactions and observations, I also found a few common themes. Shared values, beliefs, perspectives. Those are what allowed us to mingle with each other and have those myriad conversations. Those are what enabled us to understand each other even though we are from different countries.

There seems to be a dichotomy here, until you realise that there isn’t. This is how it is meant to be.

For, even though we may have different ideologies and values, we mostly want to treat others the way we would like ourselves to be treated. We don’t hesitate to talk and share perspectives, even though they may differ. And we mostly don’t walk in with a closed mind, as otherwise it may be difficult to even have a conversation!

We agree to disagree. We listen to other’s perspectives and then either assimilate or discard them. We hold on to our values, well mostly, until something earth-shattering chnages them.

So, even though we are different in many aspects, it is worth remembering that what we believe in, value, and aspire for may be different than the others. But that shouldn’t lead us to a corner if we spot differences.

Instead, it should help us recognise that there is an opportunity for sharing and learning from each other…

The art of navigation

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

Hi! I am a motorbike from India. And I am writing this to you, my beloved reader, from the confines of a garage.

For those of you who read some amazing chronicles written by my riders, I must remind you that I am still the same good ol’ bike. And for those of you who romanticised riding me, watching someone in the movies, let me promise you that there are still thrills to be had riding me.

But I am writing this note to you for something more basic. To appeal to you to save me. From ignominy.

Why? You may wonder. Let me tell you.

You see, when I started riding everywhere all those years ago, my partners (riders) loved me immensely and took care of me like their family member. They used to be careful driving me around, taking pride in being a motorbike rider.

Then, as times changed, more and more of those sophisticated riders switched to cars for their everyday activities. I became a leisure toy for some, while for others I was relegated to their garage, or worse still, sold off.

Nowadays, I am being driven around mostly by people who are in a hurry. Those who want to beat the traffic on the roads and whoosh past everyone. They see me only as a utility vehicle, secretly still wishing they had a car.

So, they drive as if they are possessed by a spirit. “Get me there quickly” is their motto and they swish and whoosh past anyone and everyone. No regards to how others are driving, or who they are. Such is the hurry that some of them are fine with even jumping on to footpaths or drive on the wrong side of the road.

Then, there are those who are navigating the roads as if they are playing roadrash, the game that made me famous with the cool kids of the 90’s. So, they twist me at odd angles, without any respect for me. Sometimes, I brush off against other vehicles, who call me names.

And that’s the butt of my problem. When the fellow citizens walking or driving alongside see these riders commit these acts, it is I who get sullied. “These bikes are a nuisance”, I heard one saying. Another recalled how she had almost been overrun by one a few days back.

I can only look at those exasperated faces, for I am only a machine being driven around. Without intelligence. For now.

Actually, I am waiting for all this AI and Machine Intelligence to come to my rescue. I would then have the power to not do anything wrong. And hopefully, I will regain my respect among the few enthusiasts who still wish they had a bike…

Or perhaps, if you read this and like it, maybe for the time being it may give some intelligence to all those who ought to treat their bikes with dignity!

Socially awkward?!

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

Joy was upset. It seemed like the worst day of his life!

He had woken up with different hopes. After a day when he had given his all to make his dance performance at the annual bash a success.

Last evening, after the performance he had received a good reception from the crowd, consisting of his college friends and their families. So, naturally he thought he had done well and had posted the recorded video on YouTube.

He had then shared the video on all his social media feeds and was expecting more comments from his circle. In anticipation, he logged in to see the comments and likes. He had got some love from a few of his friends.

Somehow, however, the video had also found traction with a different group whom he wasn’t connected to. And there were some nasty comments on his feed. He was being trolled for his movements and for imitating a famous dancer.

This didn’t sit well with Joy. He took his social media presence very seriously and had been angling to amass new followers. Such trolling could do his reputation harm and make him feel awkward.

He didn’t know what to do. He thought of multiple options, including taking down the video, in the first couple of hours.

Not convinced entirely, he then called some of his friends and sought advice. He even researched online on how to handle bad comments.

All this had worked him upto a frenzy by the evening and he was sitting upset in the balcony. There were a few children playing cricket down in the community area, but he was in no mood to enjoy. He sat there sulking.

As he watched from the balcony, something interesting happened. One of the kids, who was batting, had been slow to start. He was normally a good batsman, Joy knew him. However, due to his poor form today, some of his teammates started calling him names.

The boy, even though hearing everything, chose to ignore. He just focused on his batting. It took him longer than usual, but ultimately he broke the shackles and runs started flowing again. The other teammates who were hooting him, shut down now. After the game, they all shared in the revelry of victory.

As Joy watched this play out in front of his eyes, he realised bad form or a bad day was just a passing phase. If one doesn’t take it to heart or feel awkward about it, it didn’t affect as much. It was he who was making the day worse by sulking about it.

After all, social media was a means of connecting with others and being engaged. One bad post or some trolls couldn’t take away his hard work. Or the fact that he was happy about his performance. Their judgement shouldn’t have made him feel awkward.

He decided to leave things as is and didn’t respond. He also continued with his life normally. After a couple of days, seeing no engagement or infuriated responses, the trolls shut down.

The phase passed. The lesson remained. There was no awkwardness…

Immersive Experiences

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

Some happen by chance. But most happen by design!

This weekend, I watched a movie that I was completely immersed in.

As I emerged out of the movie hall, I was trying to figure out what made the movie tick for me. And why the long length didn’t bother me as much.

As I thought about the overall experience and my connection with the movie, I realised that I felt it was immersive because at no point did the storytelling slack.

Then, as I compared it with some of the best books I have read, it occurred to me that those also had a style of storytelling that felt as if I was transported into that world. And within that experience, it was as if I was living it.

In fact, most of such immersive experiences are designed in a manner that the storytelling draws the listener or audience in, hooking them into the narrative, making them as a part of the story.

Having started my experiments with writing over the last six years, I must admit that it is very hard to do. On my best days also, weaving the tale together to make it compelling is an extremely difficult task.

Naturally, there are very few of these experiences that immerse us completely. But the ones that do, leave us with a sense of wonder and concern. Wonder about how it all panned out and concern about the characters.

That’s why I feel that storytelling is about the characters and how their interconnections are explored and structured!

What I am sure of though, is that the immersion is an outcome of design. And the design is always in the hands of the creator…

Assumed assumptions!

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

We like assuming. In fact, we love to assume and move forward.

A lot of times those assumptions are just those. Assumptions. Without any rhyme or reason.

But because we like to keep things simple and probably see them through our own eyes only, those assumptions are valid and reasonable.

But what if that isn’t true? What if we could do much better not assuming those assumptions?

Over the last few weeks, as these thoughts ran in my mind, I started observing. How I was reacting and deciding. And how others around me did the same.

There were times when I found my assumptions to be convenient for me. Because I didn’t want to go through the hard work of finding the right details.

Often times when I was assuming something, it was so just because I had not been able to consider the viewpoint of someone else. Looking only through my own eyes.

Sometimes I also found that I assumed just because I had some precedence or experience of dealing with that same person or thing in a different setting.

As I started questioning my assumptions and if I had made the correct ones, I started uncovering my own blind sides.

As I started thinking about others, my horizon expanded and I could look at the problem with a fresh pair of eyes.

There’s still a long way to go. After all, the mind has been conditioned to perform in a certain way. But what I do realise is that there’s power in not assuming just because we can or we should.

Sometimes it helps to check ourselves again…

Entitled

~ Rishi ~ 1 Comment

The clock struck 12. On a bright sunny morning, with the winter winds blowing on his face, Deepesh looked at his phone once again.

He had been walking outside the office building, not in the best of moods, after a call with one of his team members, Vipul.

Vipul was a hard worker and one of the brightest in the team. He was naturally chosen for difficult assignments and Deepesh had taken good care of him over the last couple of years.

However, today’s meeting with him had left Deepesh feeling cheated. Vipul had just announced that he was resigning because he had not got a good enough raise in the recently concluded increment cycle.

Deepesh had gone extra lengths to get him the best increment in the team. He had also discussed about putting up Vipul for a promotion in the next cycle.

After doing so much for him, the news of his resignation didn’t go down well with Deepesh. He had told as much to Vipul, sharing his unhappiness. However, Vipul strongly felt that he was entitled to much more than he had received.

As the day passed, the meeting continued to come back to Deepesh’s mind again and again. At first, he toyed with the idea of identifying how to retain Vipul. But it soon occurred to him that even if he succeeded in retaining, Vipul would not be able to shrug off the entitlement he felt he was owed.

Deepesh had to be fair to the other team members. He couldn’t afford to have other team members develop similar feelings without actually having done enough important work.

He also felt that what Vipul thought of his work was a very personal take on his own performance. And even if he tried to reason with Vipul, he wouldn’t be able to break through the barrier.

More importantly, Deepesh realised that every one, including him, had some feeling of entitlement. It was a natural feeling, based on what each individual thought his work was worth. And as a team leader, he needed to understand his team’s psyche better.

So, he decided to let go. He asked Vipul to wind up his work in the next one month. During that period, Deepesh spent time to understand the expectations and aspirations of his other team members.

He had frank conversations and gave and took feedback from each one of his team members. It not only helped him understand their thoughts but also allowed him to appreciate their feelings and chart out their growth paths.

It also allowed him to reflect about how he thought about his own performance. After all, he was entitled to do that!

“Virtually Connected!?”

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

This week, I was talking to a cousin, a younger brother who grew up before me. We were talking after almost six months. And we were discussing how we had both been so busy that time just slipped by.

The next day, I read somewhere, “the more we are connected, the more disconnected we feel”…

As I reflected on the statement and my chat with my cousin brother, it occurred to me that this couldn’t be further from the truth.

We are all very well connected. We carry a phone with us all the time and we are reachable instantly. But we find it increasingly difficult to call those who we want to be connected with.

It isn’t so much to do with only willingness. Maybe that’s the case in a few instances. But otherwise, we are all just badly caught up in life.

What used to be living has turned into survival. What used to be life has turned into a race…

Not so long ago, there was a time when we would spend an hour writing letters to our friends. They later became emails and then social media messages. Now-a-days, they are confined to mere wishes and maybe an occasional phone call.

Those were the days, when we would just arrive at someone’s doorstep and be invited instantly to partake in whatever meal everyone was having. Now, we plan much ahead of time, and yet find it onerous to arrange everything.

Those were the days, when we would just gather together for a game of cards or something indoors. Hours would be spent playing, without realising the time that had passed. Now, we try and time things so much that these fun times aren’t happening so often.

We are all to blame ourselves for this situation. We thought we are progressing but what has really happened is we have degraded in the one thing that really matters – human connection!

And then, we see our kids, who are already glued to their phones and gadgets, preferring to be virtually connected, rather than in person. Preferring to be online and hiding behind the screen anonymously.

We want them to go out and play. We want them to engage with other humans. We want them to develop bonds.

But we are the ones holding them back. By continuing to be a slave of our recently developed habits. And by setting a bad example for them during their formative years.

Perhaps, this Diwali, we ought to switch on the lights, invite people home, and enjoy being in other’s company! Setting an example for our little ones and more importantly, for ourselves…

Experience counts.

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

How often do we disregard experience and consider that it is not really important? Or take it for granted in a lot of things?

This week, as I was working to get some brand-new IKEA furniture assembled, I realised the power of experience.

As it so happened, we had bought a new table that I wanted to fix. Given that a carpenter was working on some other furniture in our house, I asked him for help.

He was a thorough hand with a lot of experience under his belt. I, on the other hand, being an inexperienced fellow in that field, wanted to exactly go by the book.

So, I opened the IKEA manual and started referring to detailed notes to identify how I should assemble the table. This guy was rather eager to get it done quickly.

Initially I took his eagerness for getting the job done as fast as he could and head back home, since it was already evening. As there were a few other things to take care of, I told him that we can do it the next day and we left it as is.

The next day, I was at work. Once he came in, he just referred to the manual once and understood how to actually put the table together. When I got back, he had done some of it already.

More importantly, he knew how the pieces would fit together and could visualise the joints perfectly. Observing him at his craft, I was amazed.

Then, I realised my folly. I had underestimated someone who lives and breathes this work day and night!

That evening, as we finished assembling the table together, I could sense a satisfaction within his voice. Of having been able to do it without extensively referring to the manual. And of having taught me a lesson.

The next time, when I call someone to get odd jobs done, I ought to remember that they are experts in their field and would know better.

While it’s always good to question and discuss things, it pays to respect experience…

Let Go…

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

Ansh was excited. He had just got a bigger bicycle on his fifth birthday and was graduating to the next level.

Most of his friends had the bigger bike, so it was as much a matter of proving himself and belonging to the group, as it was to feel older in his mind and heart.

The next day he took his bike down along with his dad, Bijoy. He wanted to get some practice in. However, the bigger bike wasn’t a natural promotion, when it came to riding it. He had to now learn how to ride one without side supporters. Which meant he had to learn to balance, learn to coordinate his actions, and learn to always be alert.

Ansh felt overwhelmed by the thought and asked his dad if it was indeed a good idea to practice then or come back later the next day. His dad understood. After all, he had gone through similar anxiety when he was younger. Bijoy told Ansh that he need not worry and with his support he will be able to learn soon.

The first couple of times, Ansh was very cautious. He continued to turn back to check if his dad was holding the bike or not. Only after the second run did he stop doing that every minute.

By the time he had gotten to his fourth run, he was pedalling well, braking well, and Bijoy could sense that he was ready. So after giving him an initial push, he left the bike. Only to see Ansh go for a few feet and then turn back, stare at him in horror, and topple over.

Bijoy rushed to the spot. He looked over Ansh to check if he had got any injury and if he was ok. Ansh was crying, feeling as if he had been cheated. It took him a lot of consoling to regain his composure. But without the confidence of riding the bike again. So, they both went back home.

Bijoy asked him to come along again the next day and while Ansh was hesitant, he promised Ansh that he had only left him because he thought Ansh could now ride on his own. While that was a little comforting, it wasn’t entirely convincing. Ansh however went along.

After a couple of runs, Bijoy could observe that Ansh was getting into the groove. However, knowing that Bijoy may do a repeat of the previous day, he was checking again and again if he was being held. After the fourth time, Ansh asked to stop. He had had enough practice for the day.

The same pattern repeated for the next two days. While Bijoy thought Ansh was ready to be left alone, he couldn’t muster the last push and let go. He had continued to hold the bike all along for those few practice runs.

Eventually, he realized that by not letting Ansh go on his own, he was becoming an impediment in his learning. That day, after the first two runs, as Bijoy noticed Ansh was getting comfortable, he decided to leave Ansh on the third one. Ansh went a slightly longer distance before he looked back and realizing Bijoy wasn’t there, panicked. However, by now he had learnt how to control the bike well, so he didn’t fell down. He just continued riding and then got back the full circle, stopping the bike in front of Bijoy.

Bijoy was elated. So was Ansh. He took Ansh into his arms and hugged him.

While Ansh had learnt how to ride a bike, Bijoy had learnt how to let go…