Positive

Superpowers.

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

There are times in life when something unexpected happens, which may not be good but still turns out well…

Earlier this week, as I got detected with the famous virus that is fast becoming a long friend with humans, I experienced one such moment in life. Unexpected, uncalled for, unhinging.

And yet in some ways, reassuring.

I know there is a dichotomy here! Let me explain…

As I tested positive with only mild symptoms and then progressed well on the way to recovery, it was a few days of “taking it easy”. In these last few days, isolated in a room with nothing else to do except reading, watching, listening, and thinking, I got ample opportunity to reflect on some of these life’s vagaries.

What definitely helped was that no one else tested positive at home, and my symptoms were mild enough to not worry. Perhaps someone else with the virus but with difficulties or higher severity may not empathize with what I am saying here. Not disrespecting them. I have all the sympathy for those who have had a tough time. But then, all of us have our own experiences and perspectives and I am recounting mine.

So coming back, as I was speaking to a friend about how I was doing, we conversed about how this can be a blessing in disguise. He mentioned that I was now endowed with a superpower against the virus and I could now be less worried about contracting it for at least some time. While I listened to his statement and laughed it off, I realized that is was true scientifically. And that’s the reassuring bit.

But as I thought deeper about it, I realized that life offers us opportunities to gain these superpowers. Specially so, immediately after something unexpected has happened.

Like after we are down in the dumps and have had a massive fall, we become aware that the only way from there is up. We let go of our fear of failing anymore and set our sight on succeeding again. Superpower to control our own destiny and of those who are associated with us.

Or after we have had a health scare and decide to be fitter and take our health in our own hands. We let go of our unhealthy lifestyle, change our habits, and discipline ourselves on an everyday basis. Superpower to improve our life at all costs and live longer.

Or after we come out of a self-imposed bout of anger and jealousy post a big fight and decide to mend ourselves to not go into the same direction again with the same person or with others. We slowly learn to control our mind and behavior and not get flustered in such situations again. Superpower to help ourselves and others in all situations.

Or after we let go of lethargy and inertia and pick up the pen/brush/lens or whatever tool we may have in our arsenal, to devote time to things we love to do. We enjoy those few moments spent in creating something or working on the hobby we find pleasurable. Superpower to be happy at all times and live well.

These are all superpowers because we want them in our life at all times, with all their might. If given a choice, we wouldn’t part with even one of them, ever.

The interesting thing is, all of us have had these superpowers at least once in our life. But somehow, implored with life, we chose to give them away. Unknowingly. Unwittingly. Unintentionally.

Hopefully, the next time we gain any of these superpowers, we recognize the opportunity and don’t let them go off into the ether…

The Inner Struggle…

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

How do we choose what we choose? Why do we behave the way we do?

How do we better control our thoughts and emotions and channel them into the positive zone? Is it something that we can do to mentally train ourselves better on? Or is it a factor of our conditioning and our circumstances and not always controllable?

These questions have been on my mind more than once.

This weekend, as we sat down for a family movie night, I didn’t expect that these will be answered. But as I got up after those 2 hours, the fog had somewhat been cleared!

It was the animated movie ‘Inside Out’, which is a beautifully crafted story of how the mind behaves in different situations and reacts to them, depicted through a week in the life of a young girl.

The one answer to my questions – what we choose and do is a constant struggle within ourselves – one that we fight day in and day out. And the feeling we have conditioned ourselves to sense the most wins over more than the others.

That’s the reason, some of us get flustered even on small things while some don’t mind even bigger problems and smile them away. Or why sometimes we may get sad but recover while someone else becomes sad and goes into depression.

It is complicated!

One thing I did realise though is that the power to swing to one or the other direction is in our minds and hearts.

The power to move from being self-focussed, apprehensive, and angrier than we used to be in today’s hyperconnected yet disjointed world, to become more accepting, welcoming, and less exacting.

Or to move from the ‘rat race mindset’ so that we allow ourselves to experience happiness in the small things in our life, rather than being dissatisfied even when we have achieved something.

Or to be proud of even the small achievements that our kids have landed up with, instead of pushing them for more and more out of our desire to excel at all costs.

I am sure, all of these are, or will be, inner struggles for most of us. But winning over them and emerging on the right side is perhaps the only thing that’s important today, as we reset our lives and relations in this new world…

False Narratives…

~ Rishi ~ 1 Comment

They abound!

In every sphere of our lives.

At home, at work, in the society, within ourselves.

They are constructed in our minds. In our words. And in our actions also at times. And then some of them escape us and land with others and start a chain reaction. Once released into the open, they have a life of their own.

Sometimes these chain reactions help us stay afloat and live our lives believing and holding onto dear hope. And in other cases, they may drown us in sorrow and lead us to a downfall.

Sometimes, these chain reactions stop sooner than we want them to. On other occassions, they run amok beyond our wildest imagination and in spite of our best efforts to curtail them.

As long as they are limited to matters of personal interest or to trivial pursuits, these can serve as a reminder of the alternative or a check on whether we are doing the right things. In fact, some of them may be beneficial for us to meander through our lives, difficult as it is.

It’s when they go beyond the realm of personal or trivial, is when they can assume gargantuan proportions. They then permeate the society in myriad ways and channelise our lives in different directions depending on what we believe.

With the rising trend of easy internet access, tools to enable social connections, and unchecked platforms to spread whatever one believes in, all of this has just become EASY. And that’s what is worrying the most.

Because, these false narratives have the power to alter our reality and push us into directions which may not be worth turning to. Or they may compel us to act in ways that could be counterproductive for ourselves.

And that may cost us many a things!

So, how do we discern between the truth and the false?

No one is an expert in this subject. But hopefully with our own judgement and best intentions towards self and the ones we love, it is probably easier to understand the intention of the narrative and the direction it may take us into. And then asking ourselves a question – do I really want to go down that path?

For beginners, this hopefully may be enough to put us at a reduced risk of being sucked up in the whirlwind of these false narratives and the ensuing madness…

PS: COMMENTS WELCOME!

Tough times…

~ Rishi ~ Leave a comment

One of my friends is going through a tough time. The other day, when I was talking to him, he was sounding dismayed and mentioned “hope I get through this phase sound and safe”…

That conversation kept resurfacing in my thoughts over the past 2 weeks. And it led me to reflect on life’s vagaries.

It was April 2002. I was hospitalised for more than 6 months by that point for an injury I had sustained in my cervical spine. That was inarguably the toughest phase in my life. After passing out of the IMA, I had joined the corps of EME and was looking forward to an exciting career in the forces, when that accident had happened.

In the initial days I had tried to fight the problem and kept going but my health hadn’t improved. Then, on doctor’s advise, I had tried to take as much rest as possible, hoping that the rest would cure the fracture. I had tried alternate forms of medicine but none worked. And finally, after those six months in 3 hospitals, the decision was taken that I had to leave the Army due to medical disability.

It was devastating. It was this life I had envisioned all my childhood. I had done well in my course too. But clearly, life had other plans.

I didn’t know what to do next. I had no clue about anything else. I had not prepared for this unexpected turn. But as the reality dawned on me, some of the fellow officers, who were also admitted to the hospital for health reasons, gave me courage and hope. They told me not to worry, things will turn out fine.

Later on, 2013-14 bought a similar challenge to my doorstep. After having worked hard for 3 years to establish my business and putting in everything, I had to close it down. Again this time, I hadn’t prepared for this eventuality. I was wanting to build a successful business. But guess, things weren’t meant to be.

As I folded up my operations, I kept getting haunted by the past and whether life will give me another chance. There was a lot of uncertainty and without any clue, I sailed out again, hoping to find my rudder and get to the right shore.

As I moved out, still unsure about the future in both the cases, I realised that I was actually not going out empty handed. Even though I hadn’t been able to live the life I had wanted or fulfil my ambition, I had obtained a lot of knowledge and training, which I could utilise all my life. And as days and years have passed, a lot of it has come to good use.

It is those years of trial and tribulation that gave me some of the best learnings of life. Those troughs taught me never to under-estimate life but also that you can only plan so much. Not wanting to boast, but as age has advanced I have also realised that all those years have given me an edge – of handling the unexpected by taking it into my stride.

And I see the same edge in all those people who have gone through difficult and trying times. They get more resolute and more understanding, setting the stage for bigger things if they keep their focus up. And as life goes on and the peaks come, they are ready to conquer them with all their might.

As I talked to my friend, I assured him that whatever happens, will be for the good and he would look back at this time and remember it with respect for what it has taught him. Hopefully, things will turn out for the good for him and he will get back to his best form soon.

As this tough time rolls off and things get back to normal, it is the tough people who will last and win!